Monkey went through them one by one: the register of the hairless and the short-haired; the hairy; the feathered; the crawling; and the scaly—no mention of our Monkey.
He thought he'd only been gone for a few hours but he reported remembering being on the table in a hospital-like room with three hairless creatures that were performing experiments on him.
Other hairless hot guys mentioned in the study (but not in the top five slots themselves) include Dwayne Johnson (aka The Rock), Bruce Willis, Vin Diesel, Floyd Mayweather, and John Travolta.
For eyebrows he had two little patches of reddish stubble; for moustache, what looked like a bit of discoloured tow, and scraps of similar material hanging beneath his creasy chin represented a beard.
He was at once the commonest and the most remarkable product of civilization. He was nine out of ten people that one passes on a city street—and he was a hairless ape with two dozen tricks.